On November 12, 2017, you were self-pitying and sad about letting yourself shattered out of heartbreak, not taking care of yourself, gaining weight, losing your confidence, feeling academically incompetent, letting yourself commit the same mistakes, doubting your life choices, doubting yourself, being irresponsible and the list of the things you weren’t proud of goes on.
Insecurities invaded your soul as you see your peers earning their own money, traveling the world, making their parents proud, building their own names. You knew it was not right to compare your behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel but that day you just could not help it but to compare. You were vulnerable, insecure and doubtful. So you wrote this letter to let you know about the things you weren’t able to see about yourself.
Do you know what’s cool about you?
Even when you are disappointed at your failed plans at the back of your mind you believe that there are better plans God’s prepared for you. Despite how many obstacles you encounter along the way and how clueless you become of what’s ahead of you, you don’t stop. When you feel like you’re already off the track you are able to recognize it right away. You are not scared to admit your faults when you commit a mistake. You know when to let yourself take a break but you never quit. You know when to reorient yourself back to your goals and purpose when you are distracted. You are a strong wise young lady even back then. I admire your strength, your faith, your talents, your creativity.
When people doubted you and told you that you won’t be able to graduate college because you just kept on messing your college life, you proved them wrong. You made it to graduate despite how hard it was for you. You were at your most broken and sick state but you managed to complete your remaining subjects and graduate. You’re fine with taking wise risks. People told you that you were weak to become a doctor but here you are building the blocks to your medical dream.
Through the years, many tried to influence you wrongly but you managed to remain as your unique self. It was hard to resist temptations but you managed to stay as you are. It was hard to keep your faith intact but you managed to stay firm in your beliefs. You kept on moving forward even it was in the slowest pace. You prefer slow progress over no progress at all. You see every difficulty, pain and failure as part of growth.
That’s why despite how bad you felt, I knew you’d survive it. Sometimes you just had to cry over things and take a break but I knew that you would not let yourself quit. Look at you now, you made it here even though you had to sail across oceans of uncertainties, fears and risks. It’ll be a long journey but you’re a step closer to achieving your medical dream. And the answer to that one question that was bugging your mind.
Is this dream going to be worth every day that I live away from home?
Yes, it is worth it.
Thank you for not quitting, for staying strong and faithful. Thank you for staying on this journey despite how blurry the road was. Thank you for all the sacrifices you made just to be here. Know that your service is needed by many so don’t give up. There are many more life battles that you will encounter in your journey but I know the strength you’ve earned and about to gain will always make you win. Always keep your faith intact. Do not ever let yourself disconnected from Allah (God.) Use this profession as your tool to live your life purpose of helping others live theirs’.